The Tales of Dante and Nero
by Sinful Deity
Summary: Oneshots and possibly mini-series revolving around Dante and Nero :3 Dante x Nero Possible porn Nah I'm kidding, lots of porn Ranges from fluff to intense sexy times :D Rated M for reasons
1. It's a 10!

Established relationship  
Just a bit porn-y  
"Dante is on a mission a few towns over, and the derps have phones"

* * *

**[On a scale of 1-10 what would you rate my dick?]  
****10:01pm**

Nero sat on the couch, dumbfounded. His eyebrows furrowed and his mouth opened slightly. Really, Dante was _retarded_. Nero stared at the message in his phone's inbox for what seemed like an eternity before tossing his phone to the other end of the couch.

**[1 being the worst 10 being the best]  
****10:17pm**

Nero rolled his eyes when he heard that a second message came in. Reluctantly, he leaned over and read the message, groaning when he figured that the older probably wanted an actual answer. He was actually considering replying, but Dante was supposed to be on a mission, and he really didn't feel like feeding the man's already too big ego.

**(How about you focus on the shit you should be doing old man?)  
****10:20pm**

Nero sent the message and was surprised to get Dante's reply less than a minute later.

**[Nothin to do kid]  
****10:20pm**

**[Now tell me]  
****10:22pm**

Nero rolled his eyes, contemplating whether or not he should just set his phone down and go to bed or if he should give his honest opinion. Nero sighed in resignation and began to type out his reply.

**(...Well whaddya mean? How well you use it? Or how well I like the size?)  
****10:28pm**

Nero had the grace to blush as he pressed send.

Really, Dante destroyed his sense of shame.

Nero jumped when his phone vibrated.

**[Both]  
****10:29pm**

Nero thought about his reply. And he hated himself, because he really _thought_ about it. Date was an extremely pleasing lover; he could be amazingly gentle and unbelievably rough. The size of his cock was utter perfection, or at least it was to Nero. He felt so full, it reached so deep. Dante could hit the right spot without even trying. If Nero had to give his honest opinion, it would be 10/10.

Nero began typing.

**(-11 :))  
****10:32pm**

Nero snickered as he imagined the frustration on the older's face.

**[Yah know what. Whatever kid]  
****10:35pm**

Nero barked laughter, flushing down to his neck as he came up with a devious plan. Maybe Nero could mess with him. Just a bit.

**(Ooooh, did the wittle boy get his big ol pride hurt?)  
****10:37pm**

**(Cmooooon old man!)  
****10:37pm**

**(You want my real answer?)  
****10:37pm**

**(Come onnnn, you know you dooo)  
****10:38pm**

Nero came up with two possible reasons as to why the older was suddenly not replying.  
1) His feelings were actually hurt, which, please, was very unlikely. Or 2) He was actually completing his mission.  
Either way, Nero began typing his new onslaught of texts.

Slutty spam is always a good idea.

**(Its perfect. I wanna choke on it.)  
****10:45pm**

**(Fuck, I love when its so deep in my throat)  
****10:45pm**

**(When you lose control and just shove in)  
****10:45pm**

**(Hnn fuck, I want you in me so bad)  
****10:45pm**

**(Why cant you just come home and fuck me with that monster cock?)  
****10:46pm**

**(Mnn, so tight for you)  
****10:46pm**

**(Fuck, Dante its so good when you first put it in)  
****10:46pm**

**(The burn is fucking amazing)  
****10:47pm**

**(Feels so good when you cum inside me. Fuck.)  
****10:47pm**

**(Dante, fuck damn my ass is so empty)  
****10:47pm**

**(Need you to fill me)  
****10:47pm**

**(Mark me)  
****10:47pm**

**('M fucking myself on my fingers, its not enough)  
****10:49pm**

And suddenly, Nero was wondering who he was messing with. The last text was a lie, but the urge to do so was strong. Nero threw his phone down onto the couch and made his way to his and Dante's bedroom. He grabbed a clean set of clothes and shut himself in the bathroom for a cold shower.

x

That night when Nero went to bed, he left his phone on silent. It sat next to him, and he didn't notice the screen glowing during the early hours of the morning.

**[Holy shit]  
****2:37am**

**[You fucking tease]  
****2:37am**

**[Thats a ten right?]  
****2:37am**

**[Nero!]  
****2:37am**

**[Kid!]  
****2:37am**

**[ANSWER ME DAMN IT]  
****2:37am**

**[So help me if youre asleep]  
****2:37am**

**[Im gonna rape you in your sleep kid]  
****2:38am**

**[Youd better hope this mission takes the rest of the night]  
****2:38am**

**[Fuck im so hard right now]  
****2:38am**

x

Dante wasn't home later in the morning when Nero woke up. The younger flushed as he read the messages in his inbox and smiled as he replied,

**(Of course it's a ten.)  
****9:25am**

**(Perverted geezer.)  
****9:27am**


	2. Pink

Established relationship  
Maximum derpage  
"Boxers are fun"

* * *

Dante is sitting up, back leaning on the headboard. His arms are crossed over his bare chest, and his face is the epitome from which all of the world's 'you-have-to-be-fucking-kidding-me' faces originate from.

Nero is curled in on himself, lying on his side and laughing so hard he's reduced to tears.

"It's just, holy fuck, old man!" Nero's sides hurt, and seriously, breathing is getting really fucking hard. That doesn't stop him from howling.

"_Pink__!_" He barks, and it's as if he's seeing Dante's pink boxers for the first time again because suddenly a new round of raucous laughter is tearing through him.

Nero's tears discolor the satin sheets, and Nero takes about four minutes to really settle down.

That is until Dante tries to talk.

"They're just fucking pink!" He snarls, trying to be all menacing or whatever. Nero can see right through it though, because Dante's cheeks are absolutely flushed.

Nero laughs so hard he falls off the bed. He lands with a loud thud and Dante winces.

"_My name is Dante! I'm big and bad!_" He mockingly growls and tries to sit up. He manages to grab a pillow, and for some weird reason, he rips the goddamn thing in half.

"_I fuck bitches and kill demons!_" He then roars, a sad imitation of a lion, and his voice cracks, and now his laugh is just breathy air being pushed out of his abused lungs.

Nero _really can't breathe _so he whispers to himself.

"_**In pink boxers!**__" _He's gasping, and Dante kind of wants to punch him in the face eighty two times, but he kind of wants to laugh with him. Nero's face is flushed, and his smile is stupid and breathtaking and _beautiful. _Tears and blush is a good look on Nero. Take notes, Sephora.

So Dante lets him laugh. Lets him laugh and drinks the sound and expression in greedily. It isn't until Dante realizes, wow they were going to have sex for the first time, that he should do something.

Dante stands and leaves Nero in his drunken state on the ground to go and change his underwear.

"_Wait! Pinky! Come back here so I can suck your dick!_" Nero calls after the older, his face split into the widest grin, his chest heaving.

Really.

The shit he does for this kid.

How he can manage to love the little shit, he doesn't know.

Dante should be given a medal.


End file.
